A man looked and sounded enough like Gerard Depardieu that staff members at the luxurious Hotel de Russie in Rome allowed him access to a private suite, wherein he walked off with an expensive gift basket as well as room items such as; a purse, a bikini, a pair of sunglasses, a cashmere sweater, and a designer bra. The Carabinieri police bulletin states, "We're on the lookout for someone who looks like Gerard Depardieu, but who is not Gerard Depardieu." I believe that if you look and sound that much like Gerard Depardieu, then you should be entitled to some sort of compensation.
Sioux City, Iowa has finally embraced their airport's three-letter identifying code. The code? SUX. The new advertising slogan... "Fly SUX!" Finally! I mean you didn't hear Dickinson, North Dakota complaining about their airport code. But, they may have done better with their slogan other than, "Travel on DIK!"
A man in northern Nigeria has built a home-made helicopter from pieces of old cars, motorbikes, and scrap aluminum. It has gotten airborne and flown for short periods of time nearly six times. So this is what the King of Nigeria has been doing with all the money I sent him?
Broadway's unionized stagehands voted recently to authorize a strike over proposed new work rules for its members. How many new rules exactly is not known. One smartass stagehand representative was quoted as saying, "Either… ONE! Or, five hundred, twenty-five thousand, six hundred…" He then did some jazz hands and skipped away.
Rex Ditto recently pleaded guilty to the first-degree murder of Alan Shalleck, who was the co-writer and director of the "Curious George" franchise of short TV episodes and series of books. Ditto was sentenced to life in prison without parole, wherein every night he will deservedly be read the story entitled, "Furious Richard Goes Spelunking." by his cellmate.
A German woman confessed to police after being discovered poking around a collection box by a priest. She admitted that for the past nine years, she has stolen money from collection boxes a couple times per week, as well as crucifixes and paintings, totaling approximately 250,000 euros ($356,400). When asked why she finally confessed, she stated, "Police have guns and God doesn't." She was assigned 18 bazillion 'Hail Mary's' and 13 katrillion 'Our Fathers'.
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